A stupid thing, but come on, a nice stupid thing

That eternal repetition of the same. Even evolution is a cycle. See the history of the crossover. A genre that is not a genre but a cross of species. Read: from bastards who in turn shared the bed with each other, but after a long inbreeding relay changed back into more or less ordinary cars.

We create order. First, the bourgeois all-terrain vehicle merged with the MPV, which in itself was already a van-like corruption of the station wagon. From that marriage, the SUV was born, which then made love to the coupe and even the convertible. If one industry is ripe for identity politics, it’s this one.

In the crossover family tree we gradually see two main streams meet. The ancestor of bloodline one is the all-terrain vehicle or SUV, bloodline two has two: the hatchback and the station wagon. They were put higher on the wheels, bumpers and wheel arches got rough matte black skid plates, sometimes they got four-wheel drive for the real thing.

Then the unimaginable happened: the garbage can variety was crossed back to square one. New intermediate trends broke down what had been built up in recognizability. The SUV roof had to be raised for the impressive first time, then a bit lower again for the coupé look. The increasingly slanted rear window de-suv’de the roofline.

And what do we find at the end of that copulation rainbow? The BMW X2. Although officially a crossover – BMW X stands for SUV – it could be the successor to the other BMW that is formally a hatchback, the 1 Series. His SUV content has dropped to slightly above zero. Four wheel drive? Pay extra.

blessed age

The X2 has five doors, is roughly in the C-segment of the Golfs and Focuss in terms of length and width, has a comparable interior space and drives like a normal passenger car in its class: good and fast. The performance of the two-litre petrol engine goes far beyond the limits of the utilitarian, ‘u’ of SUV. You don’t buy an SUV for a top speed of 227 km/h.

Even without 4×4, it is factor 2 more expensive than its peers. An affordable BMW, nobody believes that. For perspective: at Volkswagen you buy something similar including four-wheel drive and 190 hp for 37 mille, the T-Roc 2.0 TSI 4Motion Sport. My front-wheel-drive BMW Smurf – hard blue with red leather – comes with all options at over 65. A BMW driver friend saw one for eighty at the dealer. As we speak have long since been sold to someone of the blessed age that they finally hoped to get rid of at the brainstorming seminar on the target group. While everyone knows, look at the Toyota C-HR: the more adolescent you dress those cars, the grayer the target group. Sixty is the new thirty. I often want to scream, but I can’t anymore.

Don’t ask for its raison d’être. You do that in the rational spheres that the car industry has turned its back on with great commercial success. I can’t dig up the sour back of that right every time. He’s just there. Let’s find out what might attract his customers, with feelings we don’t know about ourselves.

The high entry. And damn: a bit of floralness. The BMW X2 is a stupid thing, but a nice stupid thing, the only X that looks like itself. Where the X’s with the odd numbers 1, 3 and 5 have gone humorless bonkers, he can’t be denied some light-heartedness. The colors pop, the old-fashioned BMW logo on the sides is a stupidly nice detail, the BMW kidneys in his pug nose pop out of their seams. X1 and X3 drivers can get in like this: inside everything is the same. He just drives much better.

But what do the people on the street say? Hey, the new Volvo V40! Exactly, that could have been done. Volvo has the same shade of bright blue. But the resemblance goes further.

Brands also cross-pollinate each other. BMW has to acquiesce to a dictatorially leveled taste that demands that everyone build the same cars. Fashion is an epidemic of character assassination. While all options for distinction have been exhausted, the manufacturers continue to frantically strive for authentic angling in an empty design pond.

The fact that the X2 became a BMW is purely coincidental. The designer could have worked at Volvo, and it is far from inconceivable that he will draw the next V40. For those guys it’s no matter who they serve these days. Those kidneys aren’t that big for nothing. They are the latest BMW straw in an unified car landscape.